Profile No. 5: Lillian

“There’s a lot of pressure on women as we get older.  Aside from marriage and children, it’s our careers. Conventionally we are meant to follow this trajectory, you do one thing and as you get older you become more successful, wealthier, gain seniority. But why? Why can’t I be successful running my own company at 25 and then switch to learn something new at 30?  Careers don’t need to be a linear path.  ‘Now I’m 30 and at this point in time I need to be doing all these things on top of what I was doing before?’ - Life doesn’t work that way! Your love life doesn’t work that way! There’s ups and downs. We accept that about other elements in our life but with careers there’s a pressure of having to become more successful as you get older and not switch paths.  You shouldn’t feel bad about making those choices for yourself.”

Lillian is a daring, diligent, resourceful, hyper aware and effortlessly cool, Hussey.  We met in London back in 2013 and became fast friends and cheerleaders to one another, supporting aspirations, career milestones and decisions to dance all night in Shoreditch House’s hide-out library room until 3am.  I wanted to interview Lil because she has led by example in the way she truly takes risks, continuously educates herself, doesn’t settle, and is consistently pursuing a day-to-day that feeds both her passion and career flow.  She is opportunistic, and knows that when shit hits the fan, it means something else is coming along.  Lillian started her career after university with the aspiration of being a writer.  She landed a job working for a magazine and quickly learned that it was not what she had imagined…

I had set out to become a writer and yet I was kind of miserable! The dream job didn’t make me happy and it became a confusing time. Because it becomes a job where your talent and passions turn into “the thing” people pay you to do.  You’re not writing about what you really want to be writing about, it’s all their choosing.  I saw colleagues who had been doing this a long time lose touch with the art and language. This world is about corporate publishing and whatever else.  So then I felt bad!  My friends who are creative and pursuing their dreams, I had booked mine but I wasn’t happy.  So I left, for a boring desk job with a fashion brand in London. 

Looking back, I shouldn’t have felt bad because my “boring” job ended up being a stepping stone into other things.  After the fashion brand, I wanted to freelance, with marketing and advertising agencies which is how I started Silk. These notable agencies started hiring me to work on creative campaigns, and as I was setting up the paperwork to be hired as a freelancer, I had to reach out to an immigration officer because the UK wouldn’t allow me to be self-employed on my visa.  I had to apply for an Entrepreneurship Visa and register a company under my name, which became, Silk Agency.  I ran Silk for three-and-a-half years.

Silk Agency was known for creating content campaigns and strategies for niche brands that were specifically entering China (and/or Asia) for the first time.  Lillian’s former clients include Vice Media, Boiler Room, Drift and the Ace Hotels.

That’s the same visa I applied for and ran London Dance Project under!  That’s a tough Visa to get.  What was the difference for you between starting Silk, and selling Silk?  I remember with LDP, it was felt so natural and easy to start it and I didn’t give a second thought to the fear of failure.  But then selling it became this very delicate process, as if I was finding new parents for my puppy!  That decision was so hard but I knew it had to be done.  But I think this is important for creative entrepreneurs to read because there will always be a time where you do have to make the difficult decision to move on.  It’s in our DNA to grow and change and that’s how creative people evolve as creatives!

Yeah!  Starting Silk felt so easy. When you’re doing it and running it, it’s difficult because there’s ups and downs. But the beginning was an extension of ME!  “This is Silk, this is who I am!”  It embodied who I was and what I wanted to work on. 

But then three years later, I was a different person and Silk no longer reflected who I was.  When I made the decision to let go and start looking at other options, there was the obvious sadness because I had built this for three years and it had become my life… But it was letting go of a person I wasn’t anymore.  This internal conflict of my personal evolution with this business identity.  I had to say goodbye to this “old” version of myself.

At 25 starting Silk I was gung-ho about everything and was going full force! Three years later, I was more thoughtful, I had learned more about the world. I had grown up. A part of that growth was my internal conflict with China as a policed country.  Everything is censored and controlled there.  I would do these reports for my clients, diving into Chinese analytics and then come back with these strategies but inside be like, there’s a lot of problems here!!!  It was against my own beliefs.  That no longer represented me.

Silk ended up being absorbed by a big ad agency, so they would take over and I would continue working with them.  They were going to pay me a sign up bonus instead of a buyout, and then sponsor me with a corporate visa.  And so typical - the whole thing blew up!!  They made it sound like this amazing deal, but turns out the company was having a lot of problems.  My visa never happened.  So I had to leave and find it elsewhere. 

You can probably relate to this, but it’s hard to go from being your own boss to following someone else!  You’re doing your own thing, and now you’re reporting to someone. It was scary and unsettling because I started questioning myself, is this the right move? and people around me are questioning me as to why I would leave “this great thing” {that was Silk} behind.   I wish I had more confidence at the time, but I knew I had to keep moving.  When you’re on this journey to evolve your career into something great, you will go through these big shifts and changes every two to three years.  You will uproot and learn something new. 

OK - so after it all went to shit!  Where are you now?  What happened?

So after it all went to shit! I  was depressed for like - two months. I was like, dust it off, let’s get a regular job again -

I remember you called me and were like “I think I’m moving to California…”

That’s right!!  Oh wow… Well I ended up getting a job at a creative agency and entering Ad Land In London. Which was interesting because I never wanted to work corporate, but I learned so much from this structured, large scaled agency world! It was the first time I led and managed big teams of people, where they report to you. I learned to be a leader in an effective way which is so useful for other parts of my life. Cultivating both internal and client relationships.  But this job was about numbers and sales.

Then another shift… I felt so much better about it as I had released the stigma of feeling bad for making a change.  Looking back I’m so happy I’ve had all of this experience throughout my career!  I understand what elements I really enjoy and what I felt uncomfortable doing.  I love strategy and creative.

Where I am now is working with luxury brands who are at various stages of their journey, doing marketing, content and strategies.  Luxury is an interesting space because at a certain expense it becomes much more about the story of the brand, which I am drawn to.  Helping the brand tell that story to the consumer.

This job has also allowed me time to work on passion projects as well.  I’ve really found a stride with having my passions be involved in my daily work.  My job makes me happy, is a great use of my skills and I’m helping people.  Then the passion projects exercise my talents and what I love.  Like working with the Design Biennale in London, my Phaidon book on Shanghai, and also Ethereal Blooms.

Talk about Ethereal Blooms! 

I love flowers.  I wanted to learn more about the flower market and found very quickly that this multi-billion dollar industry is incredibly unsustainable.  The emissions per stem is just so much.  They cut the flowers overseas, Holland for example, refrigerate and fly them to North America, put them in temperature controlled trucks and drive them around the country.  Then you have them for a week.  Two of my girlfriends had done all this research on bio-treated flowers and had started a small brand using the technology.  They create these beautiful arrangements using fresh cut flowers that go through a bio-treatment process to keep them fresh for up to one year.  I’ve been working with them now for quite a while and it’s so wonderful to be part of something that is good for the planet and actually makes people happy!  Flowers make people so happy! We’re in Harrods now too. 

My wedding bouquet is coming from Ethereal Blooms - you know that right?! 

Oh-my-god yes!! And then you will have it as a memento for a year after! I love being part of something that puts such a big smile on people’s faces.  Flowers do that!  What else does that?!

It’s important to have both passion and career elements in your life.  When you have this creative energy where you feel like if you don’t use it you’ll die, then you have to incorporate that into your life.  On the other side, your power and ambition and career; those mornings where you’re getting ready for a meeting you know you’re going slay. When those things intersect that’s great, and if they don’t and they’re on different streets that’s okay too. You’re allowed to struggle to figure it out and decide to go further with one versus the other.  Not letting others judge your decision to let go and move off of the linear path.  To not let yourself feel bad for doing things your way.  But to create the space to have both that suits you and makes you happy - when you find that you’re crushing it.

Instagram: @lillianhe_

Lillian is originally a Cali girl from San Francisco raised all over the world from Kuwait to Italy to Singapore, residing in London, UK.